You asked for it

Here's the deal;

I use facebook and my e-mail to update people on my crazy life and for some reason they are so entertained by this madness they asked me to blog about my experiences so I thought, why not?
I was surprised that even being computer stupid does not exclude you from these adventures so here I am.

My latest fun has been being diagnosed with thyroid cancer which I am sure some people will find it appalling that I can write with humor about this or even think it is any where near funny. It is not but my other choice is to crumble but I choose to STAND.
This all started with a plugged up ear and on the second Dr. visit he felt my neck and said, "I think you have a goiter." which he was very excited about as it was his second goiter that week.
So after looking and feeling my neck I figured I did indeed have a goiter and it was pretty big.. I am a big girl, anybody else would have been tipped over by the size of this thing but I just thought I had a thick neck to match my middle.
So from there I am sent for a mamogram (Oh, I hadn't had one of those in a couple ofyears so why not cover all my lumps & bump?) First for an ultrasound on my neck which now felt to me like I had a basketball in there...How did I not notice this huge thing?
From there I was headed to an endrocronologist who did her own ultrasound and looked at me from her size 0 pants and asked if I had a weight problem or ever struggled with my weight... HELLO! I just splayed out my hands to which she nodded her head and sent me for an esphagus swallow test and a cat scan on my neck. Everyone was impressed with the size of my goiter. I named him Gary.
So next to the surgeon who felt Gary one time and said, "Wow, this is huge, it's going into your collarbone..." It is worrisome to see so many people get excited about Gary. I think he is now a celebrity in the medical field here locally. Yeah, he says, Gary has to go.
In the mean-time my mammy did not go well. Just as I am sitting there thinking about great that I have only had to deal with women during this experience I am told the Doctor sees something and would like an ultrasound on my breast. MMM, the doctor is MALE! So, that was embarrassing and they still keep my top half naked.
One more test and this time they head me back to a bed with a hole in it that I use a step stool to get on and drop the offending boob into the rabbit hole for another look see. Yeah, they think I will have to have a needle biopsy. I got the golden ticket to come back for that bad boy in between the goiter fun.
The good news is after another trip into the bizarre udder machine they can't find the strange spot and I am cleared on the needle biopsy.(and men have to bend over a cough? Give me a break.)
So Gary was evicted from my neck on August 12, 2009. He went without a fight & it was a nice overnight stay in the hospital. A week later I get the call that I have thyroid cancer. Let the games begin.. just when I thought I was at least at the half time show.